Monday, October 2, 2017

|| typing ||

(completely unrelated picture to the post)

For a while, I've been praying and looking around for an online job that I could do from here that pays in dollars.  For whatever reason, I never really found any solid leads.  Then, while on holiday, thought I'd do another google search.  I came upon a company that does transcription.  Now, this particular company is entry level.  I'm definitely not going to make millions.  In fact, I joke that each week, I make enough to buy a cup of coffee on holiday - haha!!

BUT.  It is a start into a field of work.  My long term goal is to take an online transcription course that I have found and then branch out into marketing my skills independently rather than working for a company.

Since, I spend a lot of my "work time"waiting for files to come through, I did another google search the other day and found yet another transcription company.  Now this company's entry test was considerably more difficult than the first company I applied for.  So, I'm hoping (and praying) that I get this second transcription job with (hopefully) better files.  This second company has a stricter quality code for its typists and also offers support on the files you type.  This first company I'm currently with, basically sends me files with no feedback on how I perform.  

I like the transcription, though.  It's not easy.  Lots of files are distorted, plenty of background noise,  etc..But, in my advantage, I feel like I have a wide knowledge base of accents.  :)  So, that helps.  And because I'm a nerd, it's strangely addicting.

As a work at home mommy, I've figured out time slots for myself to work.  After Jules naps in the morning, the kids go outside to play for an hour.  Then, one to two hours (if I'm lucky - like today!)  in the afternoon; then an hour after I put the kids to bed.  So really, I'm not doing tons and tons of work but every little bit is a super help.  Since there's not a continual stream of files coming through for me to type, I typically have my farm bookkeeping or Sunday school things to keep myself busy while I wait.  

If you're interested in something like this, here's my typist referral link.  :)

https://typists.quicktate.com/transcribers/signup?referral_code=1a318a90a362fbd77296155ffa276756 



Wednesday, September 27, 2017

|| my girl ||


Oh, my precious, precious, spirited girl.  So much like your mother, bless your little heart. Friday afternoon, you put this (too big right now) dress on and said proudly, "I wear a pretty dress like you momma." That nearly broke my heart in two. (So convicting!!)  Even when you were not even two years old, you insisted on wearing a jean jacket so you could match momma.  You want to bake like momma.  Crack eggs (in the office) like momma.  Help clean the house (high five, that's my girl!).  

And your momma, precious girl, is just a sinner saved by grace.  Plodding through her faults and failures one day at a time!!  But because I have little blue eyes looking right up at me every single day, I beg God for His redeeming grace to pour through me so that I might be a picture of a gracious woman to you.  It's hard work.  But so worth it.  Being a mommy is sanctification and I praise God for the opportunity to grow in my Christian life because of you and your brother.  

Today, I made you sit and fold your hands (just so I could gather my thoughts) after you had been tearing apart your foam mattress to make a "desen island", aka a desert island.  (who knew?!!)  You obeyed so nicely and sat patiently.  Then when I praised you for obeying you said, "That made Jesus happy!" Why YES IT DID!!  

Your Papa and I are so proud of you.  We love you so much.

Sunday, September 17, 2017

|| unexpected ||


One week ago tonight, we found out the Leon's uncle unexpectedly passed away from a heart attack.  And he wasn't saved.  The memorial service on Friday was quite large and poignant.  He was a well-loved man and leaves a big hole in his community.  

I've always known it was special that all of my family members had accepted the Lord as their Saviour.  I knew it was special; I'd never deny that.  But it has become a more truer reality once Uncle Mike died.  I think I've cried more over his passing than any other family member's.  The reality of where he is now is so heavy.  I know it was his choice to reject the Lord.  But oh.  How painful.  

It's made my salvation sweeter.  It's made my family's salvation sweeter.  And I fall to sleep at night begging God for the souls of my children, my nephews, and family friends here in Zambia who have yet to make this decision for Christ.

Hug your older family members just a little tighter next time you see them.  And pray.  Pray for those you know who are unsaved.  We sang "So Little Time"in Sunday school this morning (which reduced me to tears).  But as we were singing I thought, you know...if someone rejects the Gospel, there's nothing we can do about that.  But I guarantee, I'll never stand before the Lord and say I prayed hard enough and long enough for their soul.  That is the one thing I can do.  I can pray and beg God for their soul.  And that's what I'm going to do.  As sad as this past week has been, it's put a fresh determination and a brighter vision for my prayer life.  

Monday, August 7, 2017

|| observations ||

about the only "American" picture I have on my computer

Our time in the States far surpassed our expectations, per usual.  My #1 highlight was being with family.  What a treasured time!

I wrote down a few observations that made me laugh.

1) So many people wear FitBits!!  I don't notice things on people usually.  But that did get my attention.  
2) What is the hype about cold brew coffee??? Is it that good?  Simply a trend? It was everywhere.  And not just iced coffee but cold brew(ed) coffee.  I didn't try it but if it really is that good, I'll look into it and try some here.  Tell me what I should know!!
3) It is so easy to make and/or save money!!!  Right towards the end of our trip, I noticed the outside of the Huggies box said "download our app".  So I did.  Aaaaand all along, I could have been racking up points towards a free gift card for all those diapers I bought while I was in the States!!  Wow!  Wondering if I could somehow convince our store here to convert my receipt to dollars and I could still earn....haha - probably not.



Then on the reverse...coming back home:

1) I was glad when I pulled into the gas station for the first time back home.  (sigh) Full service here (aaaaaah!!) :)
2) My sister-in-law lives on a very busy main street in the capitol city.  The first morning back, a marching band went parading down the road.  All kinds of fuzzy feelings went through me - what a cute, little welcome home; nice, upbeat music, etc...Until at the very end of the very peppy little band, there was a car blaring African music.  (sigh)
2) We did a scavenger hunt the other night with friends and family.  One of the items was a K5 fuel slip.  Forgot that we don't pay by credit card here.  We also don't get a receipt here when paying cash for fuel unless we ask.  Then, there's no such thing as only filling up with K5.  So we filled up with K25 and still got a receipt for K5. Whew.
3) My maids. Aaaaaaaaaaaahh.  Welcome home.  Sounds spoiled but ya know, one MUST take full advantage of the very FEW advantages we have here.  I missed my girls and they missed me.  Got a hug from all of them. Aww!
4) We are back to terrible internet. (eye roll)

And yes, it is good to be home.  For the first time on a holiday, I didn't "miss" home, per se.  But I knew I'd be absolutely fine once I arrived on the farm.  And I was.  It's really good to be home.

Tuesday, June 27, 2017

|| so far ||


Well, I survived The Trip Over Alone.  I've lived to tell the tale.  14 hours is quite a long time with an almost 11 month old in a plane.  Liesl did good as she was mesmerized by movies for her entire wake time.  I also broke down and bought airport toys for the sake of sanity (or something like that...).  

Observations so far:

:: Being from Z, I smile and nod at just about everyone.  In Dubai, I had the urge to strike up a conversation with the taxi driver and, seriously, She wasn't interested.

:: Toys are SO cheap.  An $80 toy in Z is $15 here....the exact same toy.  That's really blown my mind.

:: On the contrary, it seems as if food is more expensive here.

:: One morning, it started to rain and my first instinct was "get ready for the power to go out...water boiled, bottles ready, laundry done".  It was just a one second instinct but I chuckled to myself.

:: Laundry!  What a dream to throw in 2 or 3 loads a day!!  I'm loving it.  Maid or no maid, it's fun to do laundry here...other than the ironing.

:: How in the world do mothers do their thang here?  How do you get your groceries in the house without your kids falling down the stairs?  How do you get out of the house without a maid??  Do your kids sit in high chairs all day?? 😂  In the house, I'm okay but trying to get any-wheeeeeere is a serious challenge.  I'm used to pulling up. Beep! (once and politely, mind you) Out comes the maid.  We all carry in something and then the maid finishes up.  Then, while I unpack the groceries and put things away in the cupboards, the maid takes the kids outside to play.  How do you all surviiiiiiiiiiiiiiive??? 

::  I knew this was coming and it's already here.  I get paranoid about everything when I'm in the States.  I don't want the kids to play in the grass because it's been fertilized.  They can't chew on the rocks or the sticks because fertilizer might have touched them.  I panic about Lyme disease. 😐 I'm not so germophobic this time around but there's a fair share of things that I'm on high alert about.  Whereas back home, the kids eat dirt; pet the animals; chew on sticks; etc; etc...

:: And oh the shopping.  Oh the shopping.  Oh the shopping.  I almost got shaky today in Marshall's there were just gobs of beautiful things.  But, I'm almost shopped out at this point which is a good thing. 

So we are well and loving being at Omie and Opa's.  Friday is a big day as that's when Leon arrives.  And then Monday is a great day as that's when we see cousins (!!) and aunties and uncles and great Grandma.  So lots of smiles and happiness the next few days.

Looking forward to sharing more!

Sunday, June 4, 2017

|| reality check ||




I know it seems sensational in a story book kind of way that we employee lots of people.  Last month, I filled out pay slips for 68 people on the farm. We have a laundry girl.  Each of the three houses has a maid. Yes, someone scrubs my toilet, chops my vegetables, peels my potatoes, empties my trash can, and pushes my children on the swing or in the pram.



But the reality of it is, frankly, exhausting.  We deal with jealousy issues amongst the staff; theft (petty and otherwise); family issues; organize doctor appointments and medications where necessary; and then we manage their work.  They break things; don't do as we ask; don't report when something's not working right; don't report when something's empty and you need to buy it. AND, that usually happens after you've just been to the store or to town 5 minutes prior. If you send them to another worker to relay a message, that worker will refuse to listen because...ya know....we "don't take instructions from one another".  They refuse to teach another employee their job in fears of losing the job themselves.  They don't delegate the work OR help one another.  They threaten with casting spells on each other. Amongst each other, there's danger of offending someone which can land one in court. 


(so thankful for ^Zondi, who is born again!)

But the flip side is that they are:  terribly funny with a fantastic sense of humour; quite content despite their poverty; in endurance and strength, the hardest workers I've ever known; happy; family orientated; so respectful (have Americans beat by a heap in this aspect).  We, as a family, become incredibly attached to our staff.  They are an extension of us.  Spending 48+ hours each week with them weaves quite a tight bond.  We care about them.  

You want to alleviate their poverty so much.  But the more you give them, the more they expect and demand.  How's that for complicated?  The more you trust them, it's more likely that they will steal from you.  And not just petty theft such as sugar, salt, and flour; we don't begrudge that at all!  But your profit:  feed, chickens, meat, milk, diesel.

Do you know what they need?  Jesus.

I want to put my head in my hands or pull the covers over my head for the day and ignore every single worker and demand on my time for just one day.  In fact, if my maid calls off sick for a day, I enjoy the break of having someone in my house from 7 - 5.  

Do you know what I need?  Jesus.

I'm so thankful to be a Christian.  To have access to the Holy Spirit when I need wisdom.  Wow.  This culture thing sometimes has a choke hold on me.  I also need a physical break which is coming!  To live here successfully, one must also be able to escape each year and remember why it is so great to live in this country.  And prayer.  Lots and lots of prayer.  The only way our staff will improve is if they are truly born again Christians.  What a blessing it will be to see them come to Christ one by one over the coming years.  

Monday, May 29, 2017

|| nervous excited nerves ||

Nervous. Excited. Nervous. Excited.  Excited.

 YÁLL. We are less than 20 days away from leaving for the States. I have a list to finish...getting Sunday school things organized and packing my bags to carry on the plane are the biggest "things"to do.

So many questions race through my mind. I'm starting to dream about different aspects of the next few weeks.  Did I get Jules'passport stamped?  Do I have a consent letter from Leon?  How (in the world) am I going to keep 2 kids entertained for 15 hours???? Please, please, please don't sleep through your alarm in Dubai on Friday morning.

So much to look forward to: hugging my parents, shopping, hugging familiar faces at my church, DROPPING MY KIDS OFF IN A NURSERY AND ENJOYING A CHURCH SERVICE, going up to MI for a day, hugging my Oma and aunt and hopefully some great-Aunts, Amish country, real good burgers, deep dish pizza, Chipotle, shopping, the public library, the zoo, the park, ice cream cones, hugging my nephews, my sisters-in-law, my brothers, did I fail to mention, shopping!!!

Things I know I'll miss:  the casualness of life here, the absence of sugar in everything.  That's about all I can think I'll miss at this point.


I've already started doing online shopping and taking advantage of Memorial Day sales.  There's NO WAY, I'm dragging two kids around shopping every single day.  I got away with it last time because Liesl was only 11 months.  Not a chance that's happening this time.  I think I'll have to sneak in and out during nap times and early bed times.


I am so excited about our trip, I wish you could touch the screen and feel it.  But, the reality of it is also not too far behind.  Strange how one changes in four years.  This "farmer's wife life"has become my new normal.  It's my new reality.  I'm not a missionary straddling two cultures (or trying to, at least).  This IS my kids'culture.  This is my new adopted culture and it's changed me.  Some things ( a whole lot of things) for the good.  I'm so grateful.  Some things....meh...not so thrilled about the changes. So, as excited as I am and will remain, I do have one foot solidly planted in reality.  This is just a visit.  I'm coming back home at the end of July.

But while I'm there.......oooooooooooh yes, I will be soaking in every single second with nary a backward glance.

Monday, May 15, 2017

::couples trip ::






Leon and I were finally able to get away for a little trip at the end of March.  It was divine.  We went with some friends of ours.  That couple is an immense blessing to me.  They are just fantastic.  And to top it off, Donald flies!  So he flew us to our destination.  What a treat.

Now the lodge we went to was the same place we visited with my parents in October.  We weren't necessarily there for game viewing although it was nice to see a few animals.  In October, the water is at the lowest level for the year; the grass is dry; the animals are hungry and thirsty.  So game viewing is at its peak.  End of March, not so much.  There's abundant water and the grass is high providing good camouflage for the animals.

We went on a night drive which was a fun experience. I didn't want to take the kids on a night drive in October.  Someday, we will definitely take a night drive in October at peak viewing time.  That will be an unforgettable experience.

Anyways.  Our chief accomplishments were:  sleeping in, lounging on the gorgeous deck, eating, and chatting with our friends.

I think all couples should try to go away every now and again.  You remember that you actually LIKE each other.  Maybe it's just us.  But, we're lucky if we get one date night out per month.  So we desperately need couple reconnect time.



 If anyone comes to visit Z, we highly (highly!) recommend this lodge.  You will not be disappointed.





Saturday, March 25, 2017

|| the nursery ||


On the fourth Saturday of each month, we have no church activities.  We are supposed to spend that time with our family.  Regardless of the Saturday, Leon still has to work in the morning.  But we try to do something different (lunch at Fig or a Lusaka day) if it's the fourth Saturday of the month.  Today, we took a little picnic lunch and went to our friend's nursery.  


My go-to quiche was the perfect picnic.  Cucumbers (cuncummers - as Liesl says) and sweet tea rounded out the lunch.


The dam is filled and so pretty!!  


It is filled with water lilies.


The flow has slowed down but a few weeks ago, the kids and I stopped to look at the dam on our way home from church.  The water was gushing over this spillway.  I think this was the first time I've seen flowing water since living here.  This particular dam has never been filled since I've lived here.  So it is nice to see it overflowing with water.


What a lovely Saturday.  Unfortunately, I didn't get photos of the actual nursery where she sells the plants.  But it is so nice to have a place near where we can buy beautiful flowers, trees, and shrubs.  And the people who own this farm and the nursery are very dear and special friends of ours.  

Monday, March 20, 2017

|| lately ||


I've just gone through an incredibly difficult season of my life.  Having two littles is apparently not something I excel at!  :) Throw in financial stress on my husband and life in a third world country and life has been a bit cray-cray!!

I know I have a maid but (for example) I don't have a washing machine.  It died about six weeks ago.  There's one dryer to share amongst ten of us.  And in the rainy season where things don't dry out on the line very quickly coupled with laundry that has been hand-wrung for a spin cycle, uh...a load in the dryer takes twice as long.  This means that when your two year old has a nasty glandular and ear infection and throws up everywhere, your laundry is simply overwhelming.  (ugh)  You have to scrub out your laundry by hand on a  Sunday night so the maid can concentrate on the mountain of towels that rivals Mt. Kilimanjaro and the mats that you have sprinkled over your (lucky you!) stone floors.  Good thing THOSE wash easily!  

Then, just as soon as your two year old finishes her round of antibiotics, your seven month old breaks out in conjunctivitis.  Yay!!  Now the inner germy freakazoid that has been surpressed since living here comes out in full force and every single surface gets washed with bleach water.  Forbid that anyone else should get the dreaded pink eye!

BUT YOU HAVE A MAID, people scream in the States.  Ha!  Well, my trusty girl is on maternity leave and I have a cheeky replacement that causes trouble with the other girls about once a week.  She leaves work early, sometimes hides from her duties, insults the other girls (which is a very big deal here in their culture), and sometimes even tries her hand at stealing from you.  Yay!   Cute, isn't it?

I have really been struggling to find the good in anything in life.  It's terrible.  I'm terrible (the Devil screams in my ear).  I know there's worse situations that others have dealt with but life has felt absolutely insurmountable lately.  I want my visit to the States to be NOW.  I'd really love to go to a clean grocery store with a variety of vegetables and fruit and push a cart that actually works.  I'd love to stop offending everyone.  Hey, I'd just like to be a pleasant person again!

Here's a few things I'm learning and maybe they'll be a blessing to you.  (I didn't say...I have learned - meaning: completed.  I *am* learning - meaning:  in progress.)

1.  STOP listening to the Devil.  He hates you.  You are God's child.  God is working in you (Philippians 1:6) and therefore you are the Devil's enemy.  Find your identity in Christ.  Feelings of worthlessness?  Treasure the Scriptures for inward strength.

2.  Let the LORD fight for you.  Interpersonal problems with others?  "For the Lord is (my) judge, the Lord is (my) lawgiver, the Lord is (my) king; HE will save (me)." Isaiah 33:22.  He is the Judge.  He is the Lawgiver.  He is the King.  I am the subject.  And the pronoun the Bible uses is "our".  So, God is Judge, Lawgiver, and King for all of us!!  Therefore, problems are out of our hands.  They are in His hands.

3.  STOP, and I mean, STOP comparing yourself to others.  Social media is amazing.  I love it!!  It's good for so so so many reasons.  But how easy is it to fall into the compare trap?  I consider it a successful morning if I brush my teeth, shower, read my Bible, AND eat breakfast by 11 am.  Rarely do all four of those boxes get ticked each morning.  II Corinthians 10:12b, "...but they measuring themselves by themselves, and comparing themselves among themselves, are not wise."

I could title the above picture:  my favorite afternoon activities - lifting weights and reading a book on American history.  But the reality is:

Favorite thing:  fingers!

Sisters, let's all be kind to one another.  You never know the inward battles being fought behind the closed doors of someone's heart.  Do you see the Mom who looks all polished but brushes friendship aside?  Yep.  I bet she could use someone to burst through the doors of kindness and say - hey!  I'm here to help you. You're not alone in your feelings of worthlessness.  Do you see the Mom who drops her kid off at church nursery early with the diaper bag full of crum, not a change of clothes for the blow out and the car seat crusted in spit up?  Hug her.  She's had a rough week.  Do you see the Mom who is so forgetful you think she's thrown her brain out with the baby's bath water?  Yah.  She's also looking for her brain and is so frustrated that she just...can't...get it.....together.  

I have two goals with my social media:  to stay up to date with my family and friends and to portray how good (great!) life is here.  But I never want you all to think that my life is just peachy-keen, squeaky-clean, perfect and easy.  It's not.  That's why I wanted to share a little of the downside and how GOD is teaching me to triumph.  I haven't been triumphing lately.  I've been surviving.  But with God's help, there's gonna be some triumphing going on over here!! 

xoxo

Monday, March 13, 2017

|| Zondi ||


When most (all) people hear that we employ maids on the farm, their instant thought is:  💰💰💰.  Wow!!  They are so rich!  

To which our reply is:  😂😂😂 

NOT!

We employ maids because that's part of the culture here.  It's not necessarily an indicator of wealth.  We are expected to have maids to create employement.  Salaries buy food, clothes, and school fees.  

When I was first married, I resisted having a maid.  I actually am one of those very strange humans that enjoys housework.  But that lasted about 7 months into marriage.  An older, wiser farmer's wife told me, "Because we don't have to iron our clothes or wash our dishes, we can concentrate on other things - things that really interest us.  So find out what your interest is and do it."  I didn't get it at first because I *was* interested in housework.  Now, I get it.  My interests include: my kids, doing the farm accounts, baking, my shop, and just plain living life here, which, to be honest is quite exhausting.  If I had to scrub my floors and wash every single plate and utensil, I wouldn't have time to be a human.  

My maid (pictured above) is named Zondi and I absolutely adore her.  She's on leave right now.  Every year, employees get one month of paid leave.  They seldom take it but they are paid for it.  Then, a woman receives three months of paid maternity leave.  About six or seven weeks ago, Zondi started fainting at work.  So I made her go on her month's leave and then go on maternity leave which started this month.  And she's supposed to have this baby any time!!  I'm so anxious for it to be born!!  

I feel a massive responsibility towards Zondi and her family.  Her husband is Leon's right hand guy.  Her little girl is six months older than Liesl and the second baby will be 7-8 months younger than Jules.  I remember as a little child in Sunday school hearing the story of Ruth.  It always intrigued me that Ruth went to a field to glean from the reapers.  The fact that providing for the poor was expected and common place.  That is how it is here.  Instead of a resale shop, we have our employees to give our extras to.  Today, I took two bags of baby stuff to Zondi's house.  It is so nice to know that nothing is wasted here!  There's always willing hands to use and take our extras.

Wednesday, January 4, 2017

|| where I'm at right now ||


This thing called being a parent is the most exhilarating thing I've ever done in my life.  It is also the hardest.  I love being a stay at home mom.  But, wow, it takes a lot of energy.  

For perspective on what it's like to be a mom over here, I thought I'd share the hardest thing for me right now in this stage.

THERE'S NOTHING TO DO HERE!  Life is boring! There's not many places to go!  Only two places in our town for take out in a pinch! Just as the scale tips towards "life is difficult here", it also balances out because this is a wonderful place to raise a family!  I'm so glad my kids get to grow up on a farm.  But I do miss the public library, the zoo, the park, museums, and the drive thru.  

I had to get serious about a schedule for Liesl and I.  I've been holding my breath until January because I'd assumed that I would resume homeschooling my two nieces.  Apparently, I don't have to pick that task up again for the forseeable future.  (I was sort of wondering how I was going to juggle that along with my two kids in my tiny house. So, it is a welcome relief.)  Now, the year stretches before me and I know I need to have a schedule to make our days productive and to keep us both sane!

I'm going to loosely try a bit of pre-schooling just to keep her active.  Just today, she said her memory verse for the first time by herself.  That's a great step for a two year old!  



We do go to the capitol city once a month which is fun.  And, we sometimes have play dates with other little friends.  My friend from Germany with her two kids (almost the exact age as mine) is back in town.  There's a new farmer's wife with a little baby in town.  And I'm giving some thought into starting a bimonthly (or monthly) 2's and 3's play group for learning.  There's so many littles in our town because there's such a large ngo and missionary community here.  So!  Lots to look forward to and work toward.  It just takes planning and thought.  Any advice or ideas are so welcomed!!

Sunday, January 1, 2017

|| meet an employee ||


I have to write some of these things down as they're just too funny for me to forget.  Maybe you'd enjoy sharing in the laughs, too.  :)

Meet Mutale who is one of our three gardeners.  From a clinical perspective, I'm not sure what birth defect he was born with but his left arm and leg don't work super well.  But that's the extent of his limitations.  He's funny.  He loves football (soccer).  He's in tune with the happenings of the farm, the surrounding neighborhood, and politics.  He's faithful and reliable to work and works as hard, and even harder, than his limitations allow him.  He loves animals which is unusual for the average person here.  So he cares for our....6 dogs, one rogue cat, several guinea pigs, and countless rabbits.  And, he's funny.

So the other day, as I was walking past the garden, I saw three white eggs sitting by the tree nestled in the grass.  I thought to myself, "What are these eggs?"  They look like eggs from a chicken but they look hard-boiled.  Why would hard-boiled eggs be sitting here in the grass?"


Just then, Leon came walking down the pathway.   So I asked him what these rogue eggs were doing in this unusual spot.  He called Mutale for an explanation.  "Bwana, they are who eggs," and he carried on talking and explaining.  I immediately switch off.  I actually missed the initial explanation, the "who eggs" part.  I really thought they were hard boiled eggs.  To find out they weren't, my mind and ears turned to "off".  

In the midst of the veeeerrrrrry long explanation, Leon looks at me with a smidge of a smirk.  "Do you know what he called them?"  

Me:  "No." 

Leon:  "Who eggs."  

Me: "Who eggs?"

So does anyone want to guess what "who eggs" are?

Second Mutale story.

Last winter, he asked me to restock my shop with lotion (or as they say here "rotion").  The reason?  "Madam, our skin is becoming lik-E tortoise."  😂😂😂 🐢🐢🐢  An American accent would say "tor-tis".  Here, tortoise sounded like "tor-TOISE".  Needless to say, he had to repeat it a few times for me to get what he was saying. hahahaha!

Oh man.  He makes us laugh.  

Answer to the question above?

A "who egg" is in fact an owl egg.  Who? Who? Who? Lol!

So glad for little laughs sprinkled throughout life.  Keeps us sane!